May 08, 2011

Woven



Many times I have said you are woven throughout my life. As Mother’s Day approached it occurred to me that memories of you are all around. Perhaps, in ways only I would understand.

As I was standing in my kitchen cooking yesterday, a quiet task that causes my mind to begin reminiscing (similar to washing dishes, cleaning the bathrooms and mowing), I reached for the kitchen scissors and off I went. Kitchen scissors. Who knew there were special scissors to cut food items? Mom did.

Every trip we have taken is represented in my home. And you were with me on my so many of them. I still remember when my son’s father (it is Mother’s Day, I won’t call him “baby daddy” today) asked “Aren’t we supposed to invite your mom on this vacation”? And I knew he fit well in our little family.

Even a walk into my Sonshine's room or around my living room, you are there. My books, my Polish pottery, my German crystal, you are there because you were there. What a lesson that is to me for my life. I can’t create memories I am not present to make. And you are present now because you were then. You are woven into the fabric of me because you were part of the material that made me. You didn’t mail it in or buy it for me. As a mom, you simply were present. And that has made all the difference.

No one else may ever understand why I get a tear in my eye when I smell bleach, chuckle a little when I see turtleneck sweaters, or long for Europe when it snows. But no one has to as long as I do.

I will forever miss you. I have grasped that. Nothing will replace you in my life. But I have memories of a wonderful life with you and a phenomenal relationship with you as an adult that will be part of who I am for the rest of my life.

Happy Mother’s Day!


Everyday Mom Memories....



Knowing we always have to leave bread in the oven about five extra minutes.....




The sled and walking stick from Germany, the rotary phone from Heidenheimer, the plant Joseph sent




Our trek around a bitter cold Europe




Beginning to look like a replica of your Holland fridge?




We went "green" before it was hip!




And the other kind of green bag!



You also gave me my love for reading......





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