February 25, 2008

Graduate School

Just when I think I cannot take another class......

I am taking the best class I have ever taken--ever! I am taking a pharmacology class right now and I have learned more than I dreamed possible. I have been a chemical dependency counselor 15 years (as of Saturday) and I have learned more about pharmacology than I have ever known.

You never stop learning!

February 22, 2008

Marianne Williamson Quote

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you NOT to be? You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightening about shrinking so that other people won't feel unsure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. As we let our own Light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

February 21, 2008

Tired of Blah

I was home all day yesterday. My boy was sick. I was getting over being sick. Now I am sick again but in a different way. I didn't want to get out of bed this morning. I was overwhelmed by life. I began to think about everything that is not the way I want it right now. How much stress and chaos can one person handle?

Then it hit me. If I am tired of it I have a few options. I can change what I can change and accept the rest or I can be tired and overwhelmed by it for much longer. Hmmmm. Isn't that intersting. So, I have no choice about some of the situations but I have total choice over how I handle them and feel about them. ? Wow. What a concept. I wonder if I have ever heard that before?

Hello coping skills?

February 19, 2008

Funny Email

Sometimes I get funny ones. This one was it.

This is an actual letter from an Austin woman sent to Proctor and Gamble regarding their feminine products. She really gets rolling after the first paragraph... PC Magazine's 2007 editors' choice for best webmail-award-winning letter....

Dear Mr. Thatcher, I have been a loyal user of your 'Always' maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the Leak Guard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from the curse'? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call 'an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.' Isn't the human body amazing?

As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers monthly visits from 'Aunt Flo'. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying, jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy! The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants...

Which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: 'Have a Happy Period.' Are you fu*ing kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything 'happy' about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.

For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like 'Put down the Hammer' or 'Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong', or are you just picking on us? Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bull sh*t. And that's a promise I will keep. Always.

Best, Wendi Aarons Austin , TX

February 14, 2008

Valentine's Day

February 14. The day created by hallmark to sell stuff or the day to open your heart to love? Good question.

My mom met with the two doctor's who informed her about chemo yesterday. She will have another scan tomorrow and will meet with more doctor's about the final diagnosis. To say I am scared is an understatement. She is strong. She has been a rock in my life. I am going to respect her privacy and not blog about her much. I just want to say today that my heart is full of love for her.

Today she can be my valentine.

February 12, 2008

How do rumors get started?

Keep this philosophy in mind the next time you hear or are about to repeat a rumor.

In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom.One day the great philosopher came upon an acquaintance, who ran up to him excitedly and said, "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about one of your students...?"

"Wait a moment," Socrates replied. "Before you tell me, I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Test of Three.""Test of Three?" "That's correct," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my student let's take a moment to test what you're going to say.

The first test is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?""No," the man replied, "actually I just heard about it." "All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not.

Now let's try the second test, the test of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my student something good?" "No, on the contrary...""So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about him even though you're not certain it's true?" The man shrugged, a little embarrassed.

Socrates continued, "You may still pass though because there is a third test - the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my student going to be useful to me?" "No, not really..."

"Well," concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither True nor Good nor even Useful, why tell it to me at all?"

The man was defeated and ashamed and said no more.

February 11, 2008

A Cup of Java

I had lunch with an old friend today. We have so much history. I hadn't seen him in about two years but have talked over that time. He is the kind of person that I can pick up with like we never spent anytime a part.

It was this month 15 years ago when I got into the counseling field. I took a job at a women's prison. He joined the counseling staff at a sister prison soon after. I became friends with him and his two room mates quickly. After I transfered here he came a few months after. We were room mates for a while and I later became room mates with his mom.

We both got married and had kids. He has changed careers and I have changed jobs. But sitting with him today caused us to talk about "old times" and all the people we have crossed paths with over the years. We talked about one of his old room mates that both of us would like to find. We talked about one of my old boyfriends both of us would like to not find. We talked about the dreams we had back then. We talked about how time changes us.

I talked to him on the telephone the night before I decided to be sober. He was there for that rough first year. He was there for some high times and low times.

We talked about my mom being sick. I lived with him when my dad died. He came in when I was on the phone. It was the first time I had cried in front of someone other than my family. He was there for a lot that has gone on in my life.

It is nice to have friends who know your past...not just because you tell them but because they have gone through it with you....that was a good visit. I hope it isn't two more years before I see him.

I am sure Dan Fogelberg could have written a song about our friendship.

Struggle

I have noticed that people seem to engage in struggle more than it is necessary. I talked to my mom this morning and told her that I am finding less need for struggle. I can recall times in my early twenties when I would stand with my head in my hands wondering why God wanted me to struggle. I don't want to struggle with anything, but most importantly, I don't want to struggle with things that are not important enough.

Just this morning I was faced with a phone call that caused me to "go into action". Then I stopped. I realized how unimportant to the grand scheme of my life that issue was. I have many important things in my life today that may be worth a struggle. But this one is not one of them. I am grateful for the ability to stop in the midst of chaos, collect my thoughts, seperate my thoughts from my feelings, listen to the advice of others I trust and move forward. Without struggle.

The probability that we may fail in the struggle ought not to deter us from the support of a cause we believe to be just.
Abraham Lincoln (1809 - 1865)

February 05, 2008

February

February. The month of love? Things have changed so much in life...I have been running at a high rate of speed in the last few months....I have been brought to a hault.

My mom is sick and I feel helpless. My problems aren't big problems compared to that. We just found out on January 25 and today we find out the final diagnosis. We will also be told what the treatment options are. Please pray for her. She is one of the strongest women I know. She is positive and prayerful.

Tomorrow is lent.