I look back at my blog history and
see the transition from painful struggle to fruitful health. In the deepest,
darkest despair, it seems I have been most prolific and creative. There
are years my posts exceed 100. Other years there are only a handful.
I still love to write. But pain pushes my pen through valleys in a
way I have yet to achieve in times of great happiness.
I have much to learn.
Anyone who knows me is exceedingly aware of my fascination with
the rapper Eminem. I have hear so many people comment on his work (I take
umbrage with this sentiment, by the way.) saying his music was better when he
was on drugs. To me, that is akin to liking a person better when they are in
pain rather than in celebration of health. Maybe he has the same issue as I.
Sometimes when your life has been
so filled with darkness, the shadows are more familiar than the light.
I have much to learn.
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