April 26, 2011

Affected or Affecting?

I had lunch with a pretty incredible fellow yesterday. I was talking about my view of the world or some such mumbo jumbo. When I talked about how I have a group of peers I can share my woes with that I lovingly call “my people”, I explained that they are the kind of friends I can call at the end of a bad day and tell them I want to poke a persons eyes out and they know I am not going to actually poke a persons eyes out, that I am just expressing sincere exasperation….he provided me with some new feedback.

Okay, gang. This is when Paula must read her own BOP (Book of Paula)! Because there are many pages devoted to receiving feedback in a place of openness, sincerity, and love.

He said (and I shall paraphrase)…..what if you turned that around a little...to a more positive place? Huh? Hippie! What are you talking about? Positive place? I thought it was positive that I had a group of peers who understood me and let me vent. I have always been a little fond of my cutting (and witty) sarcasm. Nevertheless, I admit that I listened long enough to hear a golden piece of information……

He then said:

Are you letting things affect you or are you affecting them? Holy Moses! Now that hit me hard. Not just because it was profound, but because I talk all around that everyday. Isn’t that a great question? How often do I cringe when I hear “victim talk”? How often do I make presentations on change? How often do I speak of people captaining their own ship?

Yeah, that is it, my friends. When faced with a situation, ask that question!

Affected or affecting?

1 comment:

Betty Kurecka said...

Most of us know the walk. We just trip sometimes because our eyes are on those in front of us rather than on ourselves. Good advice you received, dear niece. Cool wisdom from a cool hippie!