February 24, 2014

Student Questions

I truly enjoy the group counseling course I get to teach.  The students have some incredible questions.  I don't have all the answers and aside from black and white ethical or licensure issues the answers are subjective.  They asked some great questions yesterday that I answered from the Book of Paula (BoP) and would love to have input from others on additional thoughts or insights. 





The Q& A this week is not textbook. These answers are from the Book of Paula, simply based on my opinion and experience. What do all of you think? Add your thoughts.

1. Is it common to feel like running out of the room when it comes to our first co-facilitation group?


Yes.



2. I have a tendency to add my opinion or advice when leading a group. Is that okay? Or do I always want to refer to a group member and ask them to weight in on a comment or issue?



There is no black or white answer. Sometimes offering what we are observing is important (that could be an opinion) and sometimes our ideas for problem solving are helpful. I don't believe always giving our opinion is appropriate. Many times it is in the delivery and frequency of advice giving that makes it okay or not.


3. How would you handle a problem with a certain classmate in which you have a personal conflict that has been ongoing for over two months?



If it is bothersome enough for you I would address it outside the classroom directly with that individual.


4. How do I hone in on one aspect of perfectionism?



I am not clear on the question. Maybe provide me specific examples.



5. What experiences/things cause a person not to trust? Addicts especially? What are some tools that a counselor can use to help expose the source of things within a client? Tools?


Many things can cause anyone not to trust:



Inconsistency in childhood



Broken trust from others



Not being trustworthy ourselves can cause us to project that others aren't trustworthy



Having put your trust in unsafe people



The best tools is to allow the client to explore and get to the root of the first trusts broken and often they can begin to see patterns across their lives where they have been hurt by broken trusts; teaching them to trust safe people helps them build confidence in trusting again; always be a safe person for them to trust and be consistent; have them explore things about them self they don't trust and how they have hurt others through breaking trust.



6. Where does self-doubt come from?



My initial response is: self-esteem and experience. One could doubt their ability until they have experience to back up that they can do something. A way to combat this is through positive self-talk. Tell yourself you are successful and can accomplish the thing you doubt. What we tell ourselves has more control over us than what others tell us a majority of the time.

February 07, 2014

Nie mój cyrk, nie moje małpy

I have little desire to be involved in or create drama. Learning what is my business and what is not has been the best blessing of living long enough....

In Poland, there's an idiom, "Nie mój cyrk, nie moje małpy . . ." which translates to "not my circus, not my monkey." 


I love it! For me this embodies peace. Have a peaceful weekend.